Agreeing on things is love

September 18, 2025

It's funny, earlier I wrote about how disliking things feels isolating. But the flip side of that is that disliking the same things can bring you closer together. Nothing excites me like someone who has the same opinions as I do.

My husband and I recently went to see The Fantastic Four¹. After liking Superman so much, I wanted to try to be open-minded about other superhero films. However, after watching that one, I went right back to being a hater. The film was awful. Outside the theater, my husband and I stood with our friends as we discussed the movie. Everyone seemed to like it except us, so we neutered our words a bit and didn't eviscerate the movie as much as we wanted (you know, to protect people's feelings or whatever).

But on the ride home, we let loose: the characters were flat; Natasha Lyonne's character was wasted; it felt like a sequel to an earlier movie; it was slow but not in a way that could serve the film, etc.

Every point I brought up, as soon as it was affirmed by my husband, I kept thinking, "Oh, he gets it." At one point I was critiquing a scene where Pedro Pascal's character talks about being a "complicated person." I thought that line was odd and wondered what it was referring to since nothing like that was shown in the film. My husband responded with, "Yeah, it's like, 'Who are you?'" I burst out laughing cause I had the same thought.

Maybe that's all we really want in the world. To have someone affirm our thoughts and then feel closer to them in that moment. It sort of makes me wonder: Do people who mindlessly love everything have more love in their lives? Do they feel connected to everyone?

I often listen to Conan O’Brien's podcast. I've always loved Conan because, despite being immensely successful and adored by everyone, he's a deeply cynical, anxious, miserable person. It's what makes him relatable. His co-host, Sona Movsesian, is the complete opposite (a Golden Retriever type who loves everything and never thinks critically about anything).

In one episode, they both fought over the fact that Sona didn't believe in "bad movies." She said: "I think all movies are great because they take a lot of work to make. So I'm like, 'Congrats, they did that.'"

Conan, of course, deeply disagreed with this, and it turned into a funny back-and-forth, but the point I'm making is that, despite having this infantile, simplistic outlook on creative work, Sona seems like a way happier person. But to me, her perspective sounds rather dystopian and bleak.

To go through life not analyzing anything, only taking pleasure in easy-going, shallow things? Just thinking about it infuriates me, but I can't say I'm a happy, content person either. I feel rather irritable most of the time. Is the key to happiness the death of taste?

I guess that's why it's important to find someone(s) who has the same energy as you, so you can be cultural haters together. It's a bond stronger than anything else.

Really.